The purpose of presence: Why you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be

Have you ever wondered why you exist at this moment in time? Are you curious about why you grew up in a certain family, in a particular country, and at this point in human history? If you've thought about those questions, you've probably thought about your purpose.

What's tough about knowing our purpose is that it takes faith. Purpose requires a conviction that we're doing what we should be doing with our lives, though that's not clearly spelled out. And while we may spend a lot of time discerning our purpose and pursuing it, we may be missing a simpler way to look at it. What if our purpose was more than our great calling in life? What if our purpose was rooted in the moments we have with people?

Here are three reasons why our purpose is to be present with people.

1. The people around you aren't random.

We can believe life is a disordered, meaningless set of circumstances. Or we can believe there's a reason why certain people show up in our lives.

Imagine one day you get a headache. You find that you're out of aspirin and need to hit up the convenience store. You arrive, grab your aspirin, and head to the counter. The person checking you out is a tall, bearded guy named Oscar.

If you think Oscar is random, like he's simply part of the convenience store like the Cheetos and cigarettes, you may treat Oscar like he's an end to the means of getting the medicine. If so, nothing special will happen in your interaction. You'll be one of many who'll put their crap on the counter, swipe a card, and say, "See ya."

But if you think Oscar isn't there by chance, and is purposefully placed to be in the store that day, then you may consider what role you play in Oscar's day, assuming you are also purposefully placed there. Somehow, your headache spurred a series of actions that led you to this present connection.

And beyond your need for aspirin and Oscar's need for a paycheck, each of you has other, less obvious needs. While you're not likely to find those needs out in this simple transaction, you may have an impact on them without noticing.

2. Our actions always leave a mark.

Just as people aren't random and meaningless, neither are the results from how we treat them. A smile, an encouraging word, or even a joke can change an attitude and uplift someone's spirit.

It would be easy to lean into other purposes at that moment. In the convenience store scenario with Oscar, the purpose may be to get back to work as fast as possible to fulfill one's career aspirations. Another could be accomplishing the goal of getting the aspirin, with Oscar simply fulfilling his duty of taking payment.

But what if that minute with Oscar was a chance to be present with a new person? What if you held the belief that you could say or do something in that moment to address a need? What if you were the person who made Oscar's day?

3. Loving others is at the heart of purpose.

Careers matter, and so does medicine for headaches. But there is nothing more important in front of us than other people.

Have you heard the one about the lawyer and the rabbi? A lawyer, who knew and kept every one of the 613 Jewish commandments, came to Rabbi Jesus and asked which one was the most important. Jesus replied, "Love God and love your neighbor."

When we boil purpose down to its essence, it's about why and how we live. In this simple reply to the lawyer, Jesus teaches it's all about God and others.

The purpose of presence

When we realize our moments with others are the most important moments and trump other purposes, we will find ourselves living out purpose all the time. This can be with our family, friends, neighbors, enemies, and even the convenience store clerk.

So go find some people. They just may help you find your purpose.